"We may be separated by distance, but never by heart." During my life, I have had many long distance relationships. Because I have moved nine times, I consider myself a dependent in technology. Why is this? Well, every time I had to say goodbye to another friend, I felt pressured to use technology, mainly social media, in order to keep in touch with them and since it has happened so many times, it has become an addiction since I depend on it and could hardly live without it. But recently, I have realized that it is a bigger problem that is not only happening to me but to the rest of the world and it is getting worse every day. The world is becoming dependent on technology as well. They see it as a way to replace real-life experiences, a way to live life in an artificial way without realizing that the experiences are not going to be the same. What they don't know is that this technology can maintain the relationship but it can't replace it, it doesn't even compare to actually living it. This is something I saw on a recent visit from my cousin and my VDP trip to Punta Cana. Last weekend, I returned from Punta Cana and found an amazing surprise. My twin cousin came from Ecuador to visit me for a couple of days. I call her my "twin" cousin because she was born exactly 10 days after me and we were raised together like sisters. The problem came when we were 8 years old and were separated, I moved to Brasil and she stayed in Ecuador. For the past 9 years I have only seen her like 6 times. Can you imagine what it was like to have a best friend in school, in the afternoon and even on the weekends? We were more like sisters, hanging out 24/7. For the past 9 years, our relationship has been based on WhatsApp, Facetime, Skype and one visit per year. And let me tell you something, that one time in the year is priceless, we can't stop talking for one second, we laugh so hard that our stomachs hurt, it is like we were never apart, not even for a day. Even if we changed or our environments did, when we are together, it is all the same. Seeing a person you have such a strong connection with after so many years, feels like going back to a normal routine, going back to homie mode. I saw something similar during my trip... when we arrived at Punta Cana, there were five people that moved away from the prom in the last years and you can't imagine what was the reaction of the whole class when they saw these people, it was crazy! But what called my attention was how quickly it was for it to be back to normal, back to how it used to be when they were in the school. We didn't even talk about what has happened in the past, we were all on the same page, enjoying the moment like it was before. I came to find a theory about this, I believe this happens because of the short amount of time these reunions last. Since you don't see someone for so long, when you finally do, you don't want to waste even one second to go back to the past, you just want to enjoy the little amount of time you have with them because you know they may be gone for a couple of months or years again. I think this is what makes us adapt so quickly to the changes, to the different environments or personalities. On the other hand, I also found a contrast with another experience of my life. I moved from Brazil in 2010, and at the beginning, I would talk to my friends through technology very much but I can tell you that right now, I don't have a strong relationship with them, it got lost in the middle of all this technology. I believe there are two factors that affected this relationship. The first one is that we didn't have access to a developed technology like the one we have now, there wasn't BBM, WhatsApp, Facetime, Instagram, Snapchat and in Brazil they don't use Facebook very much because they used another version called Orkut. So, the only form of communication we had was Skype and MSN Messenger, which after one year, didn't exist basically. And the second factor, which I think is the most important, is that I never visited Brazil and they never visited me, meaning I haven't seen them for more than 5 years. I believe this is truly why our relationship has been weakening more and more, because we can talk using technology one in a while but if we don't see each other, we will keep getting apart. The reason why I can conclude this is because I moved from Ecuador in 2007, that's much more time, but since I have been visiting Ecuador almost every year, my relationship with them is as strong as it was when I lived there or even stronger. Now, I am not saying that we need to visit our friends all over the world all the time, I am just sharing how I see it, how technology can help you maintain a relationship but it will be temporary, it doesn't compare to the actual real-life experience. Seeing somebody in person after so many years has such a greater impact in our lives than talking to them through social media. I think we should take advantage of the advanced technology we have, use it to make our lives better in different aspects, but never, depend on it. I see it as an addiction, when we use it too much, we become dependent and we start replacing some valuable things with it without even noticing, we think that technology will be able to replace some experiences we have, but with time, it will lose its essence.
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March 2017
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